I started painting again after a year's break following Starry Night. I fell back into it as if I had never stopped painting at all. I was so glad as sometimes I think that I will forget how to do something and then I think that that is just being "me". It is funny some of the thoughts that go through one's head as if driven by some unknown force that is unleashed and able to create either havoc or peace. These thoughts are known to drive sane men crazy and turn women into saints.
Studying the behaviour of people has not only been interesting but it has lead to my own soul searching experience making me more aware of how my own behaviour affects me and impacts on others. Suffering from depression and anxiety for most of my life became evident after having a breakdown four years ago and being diagnosed with major depression and chronic anxiety. The events over a three year period added up and finally broke me which is something that I am not proud of but I am human after all. I believe that a majority of human beings don't really want to own up to the fact that they can snap and break, even the strongest tree can break in the wildest storm.
Unfortunately, mental illness is still seen today as something to be ashamed of and something to hide from. I wish I could say that a lot has changed since the days of the "Bedlam" asylum but people who suffer from a mental illness are still judged as being unstable, unworthy and crazy. Our prison's and streets are becoming the new asylums of the 21st century where it is easier to lock "crazy" people away or make them homeless instead of giving them the help that they need. I don't mean to rant and rave and open myself up to criticism, so please forgive these ramblings, but unless we get rid of the stigma attached to mental illness and start helping people, what will become of our society?
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